Citizen Soldier

By now everybody’s seen the magnificent, sweeping piece of propaganda by the US Army, Army Strong, which has been playing in theatrical previews for the better part of a year.  No matter your feelings on the message of Army Strong, you can’t deny the film’s power.

Conversely, the National Guard’s sister offering, Citizen Soldier, is a laughably shallow mashup of bad ideas and pathetic pandering to (an adult’s perception of) youth.  Its crimes are many.  I could list them all here, but that would ruin the fun—watch the film right now.

I can hear the PR firm storyboarding out this multi-million dollar venture:

“We need to make this thing epic.  Epic.”

(long pause)

“Muskets.”

And later:

“How can we humanize the invasion of Normandy?”

(long pause)

“Marriage.”